For the first time on the net...
Laker Jim's Fletch Won Homepage presents Fletch Fans everywhere the 1988 Fletch Lives Script.
A New Section will be added every FRIDAY
(This is not for reprint or sale. This script is solely for entertainment or educational purposes only...enjoy)
PART 1 - BEGINING (1) to FLETCH SENDS
GILLET PACKING AND FALLS ASLEEP(47)
PART 2 - FLETCH GETS THE CALL (48) to...ZIP A DEE DOO DAH (55)
PART 3 - FLETCH SEES HIS BELLE ISLE (56) to FLETCH MEETS CALCULUS (67)
PART 4 - FLETCH SIGNS FOR BELLE ISLE (68) to FLETCH "BEN"DS OVER (77)
PART 5 - CALL ME HAM (78) to AN INTERUPTION FROM THE KLAN (91)
PART 6 - WHAT CAN I DO TO YOU...FOR YOU? (92) to BUGBUSTERS (110)
PART 7 - CALCULUS' SHACK (111) to THE 4,323rd TELEVISION MINISTRY (130)
PART 8 - IRWIN, COME ON DOWN (131) to...
Click here to Listen to the Fletch Midi while you read
FLETCH LIVES SCRIPT CONTINUED...
92 EXT. HOUSE
Fletch coming back to his abode.
93 HIS POV
Calculus' shack at the edge of the cleared property.
94 INT. ROOM
Fletch is unpacking his trunk (full of disguises). He wearily gets ready for his first night at Belle Isle. He tries the bed. It suffices. (NOTE: Allow for VOICE OVER during the preceding.) Suddenly Fletch sees something at the window.
95 HIS POV - WINDOW
A large raccoon stares in at him.
How you doin'? You want me out too?
The raccoon, bored, jumps away.
96 EXT. BELLE ISLE - MORNING
The birds are CHIRPING. The sky is clear. A sedan with "Thibodaux Realty" decals drives to the front of the house and stops. An attractive YOUNG WOMAN gets out and goes to the door. She wears a "Thibodaux Realty" jacket.
97 INT. ROOM - FLETCH
still sprawled on his bed as he fell, he hears KNOCKING and looks around the strange surroundings.
98 EXT. - PORTCH
The woman is about to give up when Fletch comes to the door.
As far as you know.
I hope I haven't come at a bad time.
Fletch comes outside.
I don't see how that could be possible.
She extends a hand.
I'm Becky Ann Culpepper...
I'd invite you in for some coffee and Eggs
Benedict but we're all out of Benedict.
Thanks. I've already eaten.
Her cheerfulness matches the glare of the new sun.
That makes one of us.
What can I do to you...for you...
Well, Mr. Fletcher...You may have heard that
there's some party interested in acquiring your
property. A substantial offer.
How substantial is the offer?
Two hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
(cagey, surveying the property)
I don't know. I had big plans for this place.
A little mini-mall with a tanning parlor,
a yogurt bar...
Fletch leans casually on the porch railing. The railing breaks. Fletch crashes into shrubs.
(helping him up)
Are you alright, Mr. Fletcher?
I'm fine. I meant to do that. Helps keep
me in shape...Call me Fletch.
Well, Fletch, all I know is that two hundred
and fifty thousand dollars is a very generous
price for land in this area.
Who's your client?
I'm not at liberty to say.
I'm not at liberty to sell.
(a dubious shake of the head)
This is a tremendous opportunity...
Tell you what. I'll consult with my people, and
they'll contact their people, who'll get in touch
with your people.
Who are your people?
Who are yours?
As I told you, that has to be confidential.
Fletch crosses with Becky to her car.
Very well. I'll just have my people contact
each other then. Have to keep them busy.
He closes the door.
(giving him her card)
Alright, keep me in mind.
Oh, I will, I will...Let's do it again
sometime. How about in ten minutes?
She laughs. He watches as she leaves.
99 EXT. AMANDA'S TOWNHOUSE - NIGHT
Fletch arrives in the old Cadillac. A plastic sign - BUGBUSTERS - is applied to the side. The car refuses to stop as the breaks SQUEAL as it finally bumps the curb behind a plain van. Fletch climbs out of the Cadillac dressed in a jumpsuit. He peels the BUGBUSTERS decal off and puts it on the van.
100 WIDE SHOT
Fletch waits to see if anyone has noticed this activity. He outs in his phony teeth.
101 DOORWAY - TOWNHOUSE - NIGHT
Fletch is at the door which is posted with a police warning. Pulling out his Mastercharge card, he works the door open.
102 INT. TOWNHOUSE
Eerily, the place is just as he left it. He flicks a flashlight on and heads for the main living area where there are files.
(NOTE: Allow for VOICE OVER here.)
He opens the cabinet and looks for his file. He passes a file labeled "BLUEBIRD". He whistles a few bars of Zip A Dee Doo Dah and sticks in his thumb. No plum is pulled out. The file is empty. Now his eyes light up as he finds the object of his search:
104 INSERT - FILE
"FLETCHER, BELLE ISLE, Last Will and Testament March 2, 1989." He pulls it out: the beneficiary is IRWIN FLETCHER. Behind it is another Will dated October 27, 1988, and marked "Void."
105 CLOSE ON FLETCH
as he looks for the beneficiary.
106 INSERT - WILL
"Beneficiary: the Farnsworth Ministry, Inc."
107 NEW ANGLE
He decided to look for something else as he goes to her desk and the bookshelves. Suddenly...
Standing in the doorway with his pistol drawn is the DEPUTY SHERIFF (the one who man-handled Fletch at the jail). His flashlight is blinding.
What the hell are you doing? This is
a restricted area. Didn't you see the sign?
Signs? I see nothing but signs.
(points to the windows)
Stressed out dormants on the windows.
(pushing on the walls)
Walls deplaning to an alarming degree.
This place is obviously infected by
Deadly African microscopic termites.
They can eat a hundred times their
own weight in five minutes. And from
the looks of things...
(stomping the floor)
...this place is ready to collapse!
Who are you?
Brummel. Beau Brummel. Beau Bob Brummel...
Bugbusters. My truck's on the street.
He looks out the window.
109 HIS POV
The van under the streetlight.
Well, Mr. Brummel, I don't know
nothing about no Bugbusters.
scrambling with his light towards the door.
Professor Flammering was right.
They've been busy here.
The Deputy is hooked.
You know, you can only catch them at night.
(reaching into a corner and apparently grabbing one)
Ah hah! I got one.
He holds the index finger and thumb on his right hand tight together and attempts to display a "termite."
See it? These little buggers are the
piranhas of the insect world. The only
thing they like better than wood is
The deputy leans over to look carefully.
If you can't see it, how do
you know you've got one?
They make this horrible high-pitched
noise. Sort of a tiny little scream.
Fletch holds the bug next to the deputy's ear.
Oh my God! I dropped him in your ear.
The Deputy drops his flashlight and he brings his hands to his ears with SCREAMS of imagined pain.
We can't let it nest in there! They can
multiply by masturbation!
The Deputy drops to his knees to try to shake it out by hitting his head with his hand.
Good. Very smart! Now put your ear
as close as you can to the floor.
It's the only way!
Fletch looks on the floor next to the distraught Deputy. He pretends to pick up another "insect."
Oh my God! - here's the Queen! No one's
ever gotten one before. I've got to take this
to Professor Flammering.
(As he exits:)
With a little luck, you could be the last to
die a horrible death from this dreaded bug.
Fletch calmly walks to the door.
Continued in SECTION 7
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